I am by the River Thames in Hammersmith and watching the world go by and I see a pigeon stuck and go to help and I hear someone shout out, “Oh you, your that comedian”,
“Yes I am” I call back and feel it is an idiot, and he shouts “Is that bird your mate as I have been wondering what your sexuality is”
“Very funny go and play with the other little boys” I call back “And so what if I was gay what’s that got to do with you, and seeing you makes me wonder if I would bat for the otherside, seeing you I am tempted”.
“Wooo, get me Mrs” he calls back and finally walks off on his way, and leaves me alone and say “See perhaps I should be a pigeon and peck his eyes out” and so I continue to help the pigeon and get him unstuck, being a good Samaritan, but because I hate seeing birds and animals in trouble, and yes he is now off on his way.
I then I see a lady walking her dog and she calls out “That is lovely what you’ve just done”,
“Thank you” i reply “Perhaps you’d like a coffee”
But she declines, and I hope that idiot never pulls a bird again, as who’d wanna be stuck with him, being a Tit.